27 things I have learned in my 27 years

Loyal reader, I am writing to you on a special day. See what an amazing blogger I am? (note the sarcasm)

Today marks 27 years since the day I first opened my eyes into this world. Every year I seem to say “this year was the biggest year of my life” while last year was huge because I gave birth, this year is even bigger because I raised a little one. My biggest life decisions were made (tough!) but every morning has been a dream waking up to hold in my arms a part of me. I still can’t believe the miracle. While a part of Sazo (Saz, Saza, Sazan, whichever you like) always stays the same, I feel other parts of me change as I grow older (and hopefully wiser).

Is your pyala of chai ready? Sit back, and enjoy my 27 lessons learned

  1. Parenting is an emotionally and physically difficult task, but it is also the happiest, greatest, and most amazing experience. Be a parent! But at the right time. Even if it means three decades after marriage. Freeze your eggs if needed! Oh and no one can tell you when the right time is, except yourself!
  2. For many years I thought friends come and stay. Reality is some friends become just memories. Expect to lose the dearest one to you over the most ridiculous reasons. But always wish them the best, and remember them for all the good they brought to your life.
  3. By hating people, showing dislike and hurting others (by words mostly) you end up hurting yourself more. In the end, only you lose. Also, if someone hurts you just know it comes from their own insecurities.
  4. Sponsor a vulnerable family or a child. Even if it means a little sum of money from your salary or fill the car boot with food once a month to the same family. It makes life worth living when you see how your little input has changed the life of others. Their prayers to you is better than any prayer you will make for yourself.
  5. Give your time for no return. When you’re in your late twenties you juggle home, family, work and a trillion other things. To give three hours a week to a cause will give your life balance. You will know what I mean when you try it. Volunteer for three hours a week.
  6. If you find it hard to walk in high heels or they give you splinters then walk around in your pair of old trainers. Be who you are, wear what you want. You can’t be yourself wearing a costume or hiding behind a mask. At 26 I gave up the high heels (big deal to someone who is only a meter and a half, and can look like a 12 year old when going to OLDER PEOPLE meetings. Trust me).
  7. Self help books are remedies. This year was probably the first year in my life to dig deep and read books about how to clear your mind, organize your life to distressing and loving yourself. I use the tips I read everyday and it helps. Big time! I even read books on how to be a good parent.
  8. Social media is everything except social. It took me a good few years, but I know this as a fact now. You will only be more social when you spend less time on social media.
  9. Making people feel special makes you feel good in the inside. Making people smile, makes your own heart smile. Try it, make two people happy this week, go the extra mile to make them smile and see how you’ll feel.
  10. Follow your dreams, follow that little crazy idea you have sitting quietly in the back of your mind. Make your vision a reality and bring it to life.
  11. The key to happiness is not in which mansion you live in or what Ferrari you drive. It is who you share your tent with, and who sits next to you in an old wheelbarrow.
  12. Life’s best evenings are when friends and family sit together at a home to play games well into the night (after eating dolma) and drinking pyala after pyala of chai. Dinners in fancy places are so over rated.
  13. A house is only a home when filled with love. The most breath taking homes I have entered have been those where I feel the walls speak of memories, and the furnishing are hand-made and fixed by the owners.
  14. Don’t always blame people. I am sure at some points you’re the one who is wrong. Putting yourself in someone’s shoes is an art worth mastering.
  15. If you expect a relationship to change (whether between siblings, friends, partner etc.) you must change first.
  16. In life we need lists. A goals list, dreams list, travel list, daily To-D0 list etc.
  17. Gossip is the most disgusting characteristic of any human being. Anger, jealousy and stinginess are also ugly traits. If you have them, work on them.
  18. Loving yourself, accepting yourself and counting your blessings/ appreciation and hard work is the most attractive characteristic of every man (and woman). Note: There is a distinct line between accepting and loving yourself and arrogance. The later is ugly, very ugly.
  19. Music soothes the soul. So does a payala of chai , a candle and a face to face conversation with someone you love. This is the medicine of life.
  20. Surrounding yourself with great people will make you feel and be great. Be with those who complain all the time, exaggerate all that is going wrong in their life to protect themselves from evil eye and criticize everyone and everything… then your life will gradually be like expired philadelphia cream cheese. And that ain’t good *in weird American accent*
  21. The best gift to give anyone is to show how much you love them, and how much you appreciate them.
  22. Settling in one place gives your life stability. Travel the world, but one place  is called home (many of you will disagree, and that’s fine!)
  23. Master your mother language. This is something I continue to suffer from to this very day.
  24. Take every opportunity there is. Go to courses, go to workshops. Enroll in a program you have no idea about it. Go to a chess club, try yoga and go to that seminar about public speaking. You don’t know who you will meet, and how your life can change in any of these.
  25. The last hour before bed time at night and the first hour of your morning are the most important. These times determine the rest of your day, weeks, and months of your life. Choose carefully what you do in this time.
  26. Listen to people’s thoughts, but in the end follow your gut feeling and what your heart and mind tell you. Leave college of medicine to become an artist. So what! You only live once. Be anything you want to be, but strive to be the best at it.
  27. Your thoughts control your life. Have positive thoughts. If you think negative immediately change the frequency of your mind. Thoughts then affect feelings. And everyone must take care of their feelings. I have learned this, but still working on it.

If you enjoyed this post you can click here and read what  were 25 things I learned when I turned 25. Please comment below and let me know what lessons you’ve learned in your life. Would love to read your thoughts.

Lots of love to My Nest in Kurdistan

Sazan,

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